Earlier this year, I was asked a special favor: To write the main wedding reading for a couple whom I had never met.
As I reflected on this request, a request in most cases I’d have denied (I simply don’t have the time or bandwidth to continually grant all the requests people make), this one landed in my heart and I said yes.
I had a few months, yet no words came. I trusted the Divine to flow through me when the time was right…
Right up until the deadline. The very last day I had to send over the reading. Still no words (unless you count the email reminding me it was the last day!)
As I started to write, the words wouldn’t flow. That’s when I remembered what I teach about Writer’s Block within my Conscious Chronicling program: When the words don’t flow, it just means something isn’t aligned. Writer’s block is nothing more than not being tuned in to the Present moment completely.
I paused and realized the answer was so simple: Instead of writing, I was to speak the words. I started the voice recorder on my phone, and here is the final version of what the Divine flowed through me. I hope you enjoy it, and that it supports you in your own adventures with love…
“Rise Into Love” © Chris Cade 2015
You are a beautiful example of what a committed loving partnership looks like. And until today, both of you have continued to fall in love with one another. In doing so, it can be easy to believe that you are separate individuals falling in love together and taking the next step. That’s one way to see things.
Look deeper. Look deeper at how both of you will rise into love.
You may think you came together in marriage for specific reasons. Perhaps because your wife is compassionate, playful, and generous. Or because your husband is a true romantic who balances the gifts and needs of family with being a caring and attentive partner.
Those reasons are valid. They are also just the beginning. Let’s rise further…
Right now, notice the physical sensations in your heart. Notice what love feels like in this moment.
This sensation is your anchor in marriage. It is a reminder of the love that you both bring forth.
When you remember this moment, it is not important to remember who you married or even why. Both of those will change. Just remember this direct experience of love in your hearts.
Remember to rise into love. Remember to see the best in your spouse. You will show the world and yourselves what an extraordinary marriage looks like when love is your anchor. When you stop falling and you start rising.
You will also show yourselves what the two of you can cocreate when love is at the center of all you do and who you choose to be.
Rise into love.
As you know, there will also be difficult times. There will be times when your minds try to push each other away. To push you apart. This is what happens when you love deeply with all of your being. Because when you love with full hearts, all that is not love will try to stop you. All that is not true and authentic will try to get in the way. This comes from fear.
In your marriage, choose to rise above this fear. Know that when it shows up -and it will- you can choose to see things differently. In those moments, ask yourselves one simple question:
What will liberate the most love right now?
Ask this, and you will discover gifts previously unimaginable.
Seek not to own or control your partner. Marriage is not a license to possess. Do not even seek to get your needs met. Instead ask yourselves: how will you rise into love and meet your spouse’s true needs?
These are not likely to be the needs that you imagine. Maybe not even the ones that you speak to one another. They arise from the depths within each of you.
Your true needs are the treasures that this marriage empowers you to find, honor, and give. They empower you to bring out the unique best in one another. They support you to rise into love more than you can possibly imagine.
The two of you are together for a reason. Live that reason. Be that reason. And always above all else, never assume you know what that reason is.
The mystery of love will show you why you are together in marriage. Your only job in marriage, if there were one, is to ask the questions that deepen your love for one another. Every single day, ask questions that bring out the best in each other and in your marriage. Ask questions that liberate the most love.
Now look into each others eyes again. Notice the sensations of love in your heart. Feel your heart expand until it includes your spouse.
This is the true love that you are marrying into. This is the true love that you are rising into.
Together, rise into this love.
After reading this, other people have asked if they may use this reading at a wedding they are speaking at…
To every person who has this heartfelt response, I am deeply honored for your connection to this work and am grateful to support you in sharing it with your loved ones. You may use it under two conditions: First, is that it is not modified in any way (except for my recommendation below) and secondly is that I am acknowledged as the author. That said, just remember to make the following minor changes and you’re good to go! 🙂
Instead of wife/husband in the following paragraph, use the actual names of the bride and groom (or bride/bride or groom/groom if appropriate):
You may think you came together in marriage for specific reasons. Perhaps because BRIDE’S NAME is compassionate, playful, and generous. Or because GROOM’S NAME is a true romantic who balances the gifts and needs of family with being a caring and attentive partner.
Secondly, you may replace the 3 qualities “compassionate, playful, and generous” with the qualities of the bride you most admire, and the “true romantic who balances the gifts and needs of family with being a caring and attentive partner” with the qualities of the groom that you most admire. This will give the reading a more personalized feel, while still staying true to its essence.
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