Chris Cade's Blog » Spiritual Development
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A Wise Man I Never Knew Once Said…

Written by Chris Cade on . Posted in Spiritual Development

A wise man once stood in front of an audience and cracked a joke, and everybody laughed like crazy.

After a moment he cracked the same joke again. Less people laughed this time.

He continued to crack the same joke again and again until there was no laughter in the crowd.

Then he smiled and said:

“You can’t laugh at the same joke again and again. So why do you keep crying over the same misfortunes over and over again?”

Story originally posted on the SuperheroYou FB page. To get free access to replays of their most recent 2016 conference, click here.

Christ Carrying the Cross

Carrying A Cross

Written by Chris Cade on . Posted in Spiritual Development

Gratitude to Paulo Coelho for this story…

In a certain village in Umbria (Italy), there lived a man who was always bewailing his lot. He was a Christian, and found the weight of his cross too heavy to bear.

One night, before going to sleep, he begged God to let him change his burden.

That night he had a dream; the Lord led him to a warehouse. "Go ahead and change it," he said. The man saw crosses of all sizes and shapes, with the names of their owners. He picked an average size cross – but when he saw the name of an old friend written on it, he left it aside.

Finally, as God had permitted, he chose the smallest cross he could find.

To his surprise, he saw his own name written on it.

Reflection Questions

  • How big is the "cross" that you carry?
     
  • Under which circumstances would you ask for a different cross?
     
  • Bring into your thoughts another person who has a cross. Would you give that person a lighter or heavier cross? Why?

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When you think about the future… how do you feel?

Worried? Fearful? Depressed? Even hopeless?

Maybe complacent, indecisive, indifferent, or just "it will be what it will be"?

Or are you bursting with confidence, optimism and excitement?

… with delight, joy, and unquestionable faith that an awesome future is inevitable?

It's an important question to answer, because…

How we feel today determines what we will experience in the future.

The vibration we send out influences what the Divine brings into our lives.

Ironically, worrying won't help (because that vibration isn't supportive). And fortunately, even if we are feeling anxious or negative, that doesn't mean we're destined to a gloomy future.

In fact, quite the opposite is true. By being aware of how we feel now, we can deliberately choose a brighter and better future. We can always choose anew. ๐Ÿ™‚

One way to do that involves following 3 simple steps that my friend Christy is teaching during her new free online training: "How to Deliberately Design Your Awesome Future"

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The subtitle she's given it is "Accelerate your manifestations by connecting with your future self." In other words, she's showing how we can step into the best version of ourselves and at the same time carry that energy forth into the lives we want to deliberately create for ourselves.

During this free class, we will explore:

  • How to use the Law of Deliberate Creation to consciously choose and attract more of what you want. (If you’re using the Law of Attraction, but not getting the results you want, this information will transform your life.)
     
  • Why connecting with a future self who already exists is the secret key for manifesting the future you want to experience. (Multiple versions of your future self already exist – this process ensures you pick the right version.)
     
  • 3 aspects of connecting with your future self so you can easily manifest what you want in every aspect of your life. (Skip even one of these, and manifesting your dreams will become far harder – if not impossible).
     
  • How to choose the future you want to experience and live into that reality as it already exists. (Spiritual teachers and great authors alike already share this advice. I’ll explain why it works – and how to succeed at it, guaranteed.)

I've known Christy for MANY years and she is just a wonderful woman, a powerful teacher, and an example of somebody who changed her life by living what she teaches.

At one point she was unhappy in a pharmaceutical job, overweight, and felt unlovable and unable to have a meaningful intimate relationship.

Now, she teaches people worldwide how to live amazing lives, she has a body she fantastically loves (last month I shared with you how she did that), and she has a phenomenal husband who I personally adore and love… he's got a heart of gold.

But she couldn't have done it if she didn't believe that it was possible.

She couldn't have done it if she stayed stuck in guilt, worry, fear, and other unpleasant feelings.

And she couldn't have done it without the support of her own mentors, coaches, and support that helped her see through the mud and into the clear blue sky.

Now Christy is sharing what she's learned so that you can SHORTCUT the path leading into your awesome future. ๐Ÿ™‚

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Neutering Your Negative Thoughts

Neutering Your Negative Thoughts

Written by Chris Cade on . Posted in Spiritual Development

Considering I had recurring nightmares as a child about being overrun with ants, I used to have a knack for smashing ants even more quickly than I did spiders. That all changed on the day I found an ant inside, trapped it, observed it for a moment, and then released it outside. The ant then went on its merry way, away from our apartment and back towards the wild.

In that moment, I was reminded of the true power of "Trap, Neuter, and Release" — a program devoted to resolving the problems associated with trapping and killing wild cats. Instead of killing feral animals (due to problems related to overpopulation), the program neuters and then releases back into the wild. Here is a related article excerpt which I think is relevant that I'd like to explore further:

"An estimated sixty million feral cats live in the United States today. Local animal control often try to eliminate them by trapping and killing. This does not work. Instead of reducing their numbers, killing makes room for new cats to move in and the breeding process begins all over again. So does the suffering.

"Half of all kittens born into these colonies die soon after birth. Their mothers spend most of their lives pregnant and hungry. Unneutered tom cats roam across busy roads seeking mates, getting in fights: untreated wounds can eventually kill them."

The above quote serves as a wonderful metaphor for discussion about compassion; however, I'm ironically not talking about compassion in relation to others nor animals, but rather, towards ourselves.

How often do we beat ourselves up over things?

Many of us carry regrets such as "I should have done this" or "I shouldn't have said that."

These thoughts are no different than the wild cats…

Some people might say not to worry about these wild thoughts: "Don't carry guilt or regret… because guilt and regret are living in the past, and I 'should' be living in the present." That's all well and good, but it doesn't acknowledge the basic fact that we're feeling guilt or regret right now. And that is the present moment.

The real questions are these…

How do we learn to release some of the guilts and regrets we have?

How do we learn to accept ourselves, even when we feel so completely unacceptable?

In the context of the metaphor… how do we learn to neuter those negative thoughts?

What I propose is, rather than looking at it from the perspective of accepting ourselves, or of not feeling certain negative emotions because we're not "supposed to," instead apply the "Trap and Release" to our thoughts. How, you might ask? Try this…

The next time you have a thought that isn't pleasant, observe it. That's it, just observe it. After a moment, let it go.

For example, let's say that somebody says something that hurts your feelings, but inside you know they didn't mean to hurt your feelings. You end up telling yourself, "I shouldn't feel hurt. I know they didn't mean it." The challenge we have with this way of thinking is that we end up judging ourselves ("should" is usually an indicator that you're judging) for how we feel instead of understanding it. This judgment ends up causing us to feel even worse about ourselves… after all, what's worse then feeling bad? Feeling bad *about* feeling bad!

We end up trying to "kill" the thought by fighting against it… but fighting against something only serves to bring on another fight. Every time we say "I should" or "I shouldn't" we are fighting against ourselves and only serving to reinforce and build up our weapons against ourselves.

Internally, this has the same effect as a country fearing war so they start a draft and spend more on defense. Then another country sees this, they become fearful, and they start building up their defenses. Eventually, there's so much fear and so many weapons that people not only forget the original reason why they were fighting in the first place, but if somebody even sneezes wrong it could cause World War 3.

So now back to an example with ourselves…

In that moment, rather than say you "should" or "shouldn't" feel whatever it is you're feeling or thinking, instead just accept the fact that you feel hurt without trying to change it. Pause for a moment and just allow without judgment.

If you feel you can't avoid judging yourself, then offer to give yourself a temporary "cease fire." Say to yourself, "While I am observing this thought/emotion, I choose not to judge myself. However, in another five minutes I'll let any judgments I feel come into my awareness." The point behind this is to allow yourself to be accepting of that thought or emotion you are observing, at least for that moment.

What is the point of all of this? Why "Trap and Release"? Another excerpt from the article…

"Our goal is to catch the adult cats, spay or neuter them and release them back to their 'neighborhood.'"

If you continue to observe each of your judgmental thoughts (we all have them, even if it's something as simple as, "I don't like the way I feel right now" or "I wish that person would talk less."), you will begin to see the thoughts as they are.

You will begin to understand that the judgments you carry now, the negative thoughts you have today, are many times not because of what's happening in the present moment, but because what's happening in the present moment is poking at something painful or upsetting from your past.

If you want an extra challenge…

After pausing, ask yourself why you feel the way you do or had the thought you did. From our example, you might ask yourself, "Why does this hurt even though she didn't mean to hurt my feelings?" Be honest with yourself in that answer, and again remember not to judge your answer but just to accept and observe it.

Logically, you know you are not hurt because of what this person said (since they didn't mean to hurt you), but that you're actually hurt because this situation reminds you of something in your past that hurt. Maybe you are consciously aware of this thing in the past which hurts, but more than likely, you're not conscious of it (otherwise it probably wouldn't hurt when an unrelated event in the future causes this pain to be brought back up).

Eventually through this practice, the "wild cats" (i.e. negative thoughts) come in, become "neutered," and then go back to their "neighborhood."

Any way you look at it, though, by trapping, observing, and releasing your thoughts, you are allowing and accepting the natural flow of energy instead of impeding it. By stopping the "fight" within yourself, over time you will notice a progressively increasing sense of peace as you become more understanding of yourself, your thoughts, and your feelings.

This happens because as you allow yourself to be as you are, warts and all, your need to defend yourself… against yourself… becomes less and less prevalent.

You will feel less and less need to build up your arsenal of weapons preparing for war, and instead allow the weapons to be dismantled and set aside. They're still there, but they're benign and ineffective.

Eventually so much so, that you're able to walk across the boundaries of the war zone, shake hands with those you once feared…

With yourself you once feared…

And relax in peace.

What Kind Of Builder Are You?

What Kind Of Builder Are You?

Written by Chris Cade on . Posted in Spiritual Development

My amazing mother sent me this story a while back. I loved it, and I'm sure you will too… ๐Ÿ™‚

Once upon a time, two brothers who lived on adjoining farms fell into conflict. It was the first serious rift in 40 years of farming side-by-side,sharing machinery and trading labor and goods as needed without a hitch.

Then the long collaboration fell apart. It began with a small misunderstanding and it grew into a major difference and finally, it exploded into an exchange of bitter words followed by weeks of silence.

One morning there was a knock on John's door. He opened it to find a man with a carpenter's toolbox: "I'm looking for a few days' work," he said. "Perhaps you would have a few small jobs here and there I could help with? Could I help you?"

"Yes," said the older brother. "I do have a job for you. Look across the creek at that farm. That's my neighbor. In fact, it's my younger brother!

Last week there was a meadow between us. He recently took his bulldozer to the river levee and now there is a creek between us. Well, he may have done this to spite me, but I'll do him one better. See that pile of lumber by the barn? I want you to build me a fence an 8-foot fence – so I won't need to see his place or his face anymore."

The carpenter said, "I think I understand the situation. Show me the nails and the post-hole digger and I'll be able to do a job that pleases you."

The older brother had to go to town, so he helped the carpenter get the materials ready and then he was off for the day. The carpenter worked hard all that day – measuring, sawing and nailing. About sunset when the farmer returned, the carpenter had just finished his job. The farmer's eyes opened wide, his jaw dropped.

There was no fence there at all.

It was a bridge… A bridge that stretched from one side of the creek to the other! A fine piece of work, handrails and all! And the neighbor, his younger brother, was coming toward them, his hand outstretched..

"You are quite a fellow to build this bridge after all I've said and done."

The two brothers stood at each end of the bridge, and then they met in the middle, taking each others hand. They turned to see the carpenter hoist his toolbox onto his shoulder.

"No, wait! Stay a few days. I've a lot of other projects for you," said the older brother.

"I'd love to stay on," the carpenter said, "but I have many more bridges to build."

If you want to build even better bridges in your life…

Then be sure to check out my brand new "Instant Inner Peace" program. It'll help you develop the peace of mind to help co-create outer peace. ๐Ÿ™‚
 

Anger, Sadness, Confusion, Depression

Stop Feeling The Way You Know You Shouldn’t

Written by Chris Cade on . Posted in Spiritual Development

A while back I shared with you my thoughts about "The LIE About Positive Thinking." Today, I'd like to expand on that topic in a different way. Specifically, the question is: Is it okay to have our thoughts?
 
On the surface, it seems obvious. Of course it's fine to have our thoughts!

But what if they're judgmental? Or so anti-Law Of Attraction that they're negative or hurtful? Shameful? Is it okay to have those thoughts too?
 
I recall years ago that whenever I wanted to feel a specific kind of emotion, I'd change my music to something that mirrored what I wanted. If I wanted to feel energized, I put on Dream Theater, Van Halen, Metallica, or Robert Miles. If I wanted to feel mellow, I put on some Diana Krall, Enigma, or Enya. For whatever mood I wanted, I put in the music that would take me there.

It wasn't until I ventured further down my spiritual path that I realized how detrimental that was to myself. I thought I was doing myself a favor by "picking myself up" naturally. Sort of like when you have a bad day, and a friend comes over and says, "Hey, let's go shopping and get some dessert. Forget that loser ex of yours for a while."
 
On the surface, that seems empowering and compassionate. The intention is well. However, all those examples have one thing in common:

Rejection.

Each one of them is rejecting the moment. It's rejecting the person's experience. It's rejecting the possibility that being right where you are is exactly where you're supposed to be.  It is fundamentally saying to yourself, "Stop feeling the way you know you shouldn't." And as I teach in Liberate Your Life, every time you use the word "should" you're identifying with Your Inner Critic, limiting your growth and minimizing your happiness.
 
So then what's the alternative?

Honoring the moment.

Instead of telling yourself how to feel or trying to change how you feel, just accept it. With regards to my music, I found a real deep peace and a kind of magical mystery when I switched my mindset. Instead of finding music to cover up what I felt, to ignore my emotions, to try and transcend them, or try to evade them…

I found myself putting in music that honored exactly who I was in that very moment.

The result was profound. Instead of having an underlying agitated state of rejection and frustration, I was listening to the perfect music for that moment. Because the music was aligned with my inner state, there was a resonance which created a sense of peace.
 
It seems counterintuitive.

After all, sometimes I'd feel a deep sadness. Maybe an anger. Maybe shame. Delight and joy. Excitement. It could be anything. And yet when I put in music that completely honored the emotion I was experiencing, I also felt peace.

The other emotions didn't disappear. I didn't stop feeling sad or angry. What changed was that instead of rejecting my sadness or anger, I was at peace with it…

And that made all the difference.

Negative Childhood Experiences

4 Childhood Experiences We MUST Release To Move Forward

Written by Chris Cade on . Posted in Spiritual Development

Studies on the human mind have proven that as a child, our minds are like sponges. Everything we see, hear, encounter and experience gets absorbed deep in our subconscious minds, and continues to influence us from behind the scenes for much of our lives.

This subconscious influence can be either a blessing or a burden, depending on how it drives our thoughts, emotions and beliefs.

The ones that cause unwanted emotions like fear, self-doubt and negativity should be scrubbed from our subconscious minds – and the first step to achieving that is knowing exactly what childhood experiences are adversely affecting us and why.

Here are four of the most common types of childhood experiences we must release to move forward with our lives:

  1. Moments of uncontrollable, paralyzing fear
  2. Situations where procrastination paid off (in the short term)
  3. Inability to find a pursuit, skill or purpose that made your heart sing
  4. Moments of self-doubt caused by judgmental parents and role models

The above kinds of experiences create subconscious triggers that become implanted in our minds. These unfortunately work in the background like computer viruses, so we don't even know they're there or how they're holding us back.

They cause us to say things we don't mean, give in to bad habits, and make poor choices – that leave us frustrated and wondering "why?"

We'll go into more details on all four of those childhood experiences. Before we do, it would be really helpful to identify exactly which one is most likely negatively affecting you.

To help you do that, my friend Natalie Ledwell (see pic below) has created a quick eye-opening quiz that will bring you face-to-face with the BIGGEST Negative Childhood Imprint holding back your career and finances:

Discover Your #1 Negative Childhood Imprint

Empowered with that information, let's look at the four most common types of experiences that create Negative Childhood Imprints. And even though the quiz helped you identify the biggest one, if you're like me then you'll recognize yourself in ALL of these situations.

(unfortunately, but hey… we're all human and as they say "shit happens")

1. Moments of uncontrollable, paralyzing fear

Fear is a natural part of growing up. As children, we fear speaking on stage. We fear failing school exams. We fear asking out a potential prom date. We fear standing up to the school bully.

For most of us, that fear was validated when we failed at certain tasks or challenges – and the consequences left us embarrassed, unworthy and doubtful of our own abilities.

For some of us, that fear has solidified into a suit of armor we've carried into adulthood; an excuse to avoid taking risks or explore beyond our comfort zones.

Be mindful that our purpose in life is to grow; and fear is a necessary ingredient towards that growth. Even award-winning performers like Adele still get fearfully nervous on stage, but that doesn't stop them from stepping up time and time again.

And as George R.R. Martin says, "The only time a person can be truly brave is by first facing a fearful situation – and tackling it head-on anyway."

2. Situations where procrastination paid off (in the short term)

Our brains are hardwired to shield us from harm – which is good when you're stepping aside to avoid a falling tree; but not so good when your brain convinces you to stay put, sit still, and not do today what you can do tomorrow.

As children, we quickly begin to encounter situations where procrastination pumps us up with a (short-term) high.

Skipping homework to play video games is fun. Staying up a few extra hours past bedtime is nice. And mowing the lawn tomorrow so you can go play basketball today, sounds like a great idea.

Sure, just like smoking and eating unhealthy food, there are consequences to your temporary high – but once we become addicted to procrastination, pushing them to the back of your mind becomes second nature.

What makes procrastination even more damaging is that as we get older, the stakes get higher.

Our careers, finances and health all require our immediate attention.

…and sometimes holding off on an important task for even just a few days is enough for everything to come crashing down.

So don't procrastinate on shaking off your procrastination habit: respect yourself, your time and your life by treating it with the urgency it deserves.

3. Inability to find a pursuit, skill or purpose that made your heart sing

You probably remember at least a few people from your childhood who pursued a hobby or skill, like dancing, playing a musical instrument or a sport, and went on to turn that pursuit into a successful lifelong career.

Most of us, however, tend to drift away from the paths we explored as children, if we had the opportunity to explore any in the first place.

Instead, we follow what's available and convenient, sacrificing the discovery or pursuit of what truly fulfills us on a deeper level.

Then, as the bills, responsibilities and deadlines of adulthood stack up, we completely sideline any notion of honoring our passions; instead, we settle for admiring other people's passion-driven achievements.

But, as the German philosopher Georg Wilhelm Friedrich Hegel said, "Nothing great in the world has been accomplished without passion."

On your deathbed, a passionless life will be one of your biggest regrets. So remember that honoring yours is equally as, or even more important than, wealth and professional stability.

4. Moments of self-doubt caused by judgmental parents and role models

From our grades to our fashion sense, it's normal for our parents, mentors, teachers and role models to act judgmentally towards us as we're growing up.

This behavior often boils down to a well-meaning protective streak that manifests as excessive scrutiny on our actions, decisions and academic performance.

Unfortunately, being constantly put under a microscope can manifest a sense of unease and nervousness each time we're faced with a decision that should be ours and ours alone to make.

"What will they think?" and, "Will I let them down?" are common questions we ask yourself when we're plagued by the self-doubt of excessive judgment.

To overcome this block, it's crucial that we reinforce the understanding that we are the captain of our own ships, and that nobody has the right to judge us.

While it is, of course, admirable to make our parents and mentors happy, our own happiness comes before anything else – and those who truly love us must remember this fact.

Knowing the 4 most common damaging childhood experiences isn't enough though.

It's crucial to know which one is affecting you most. The tricky thing is, because these experiences exist in yur subconscious minds, it's hard to figure this out by ourselves – in fact, the truth may be the complete opposite of what we think.

That's why my friend Natalie created her free 30-second quiz that, through a series of carefully arranged questions, helps you identify the primary childhood experience that is likely to be the most damaging to your career, finances and life.

(Or as she calls it, your Negative Childhood Imprint.)

After the quiz, you'll receive a personalized video report detailing your results, plus detailed action steps for erasing this Negative Childhood Imprint from your mind:

Click here to take the 30-second quiz and discover your most damaging Negative Childhood Imprint.

I especially love the timing with the fireworks in the background! ๐Ÿ™‚

Of the four types of Negative Childhood Imprints, which one is affecting you the most?

God's Three Answers To Prayers

God’s Three Answers To Prayers

Written by Chris Cade on . Posted in Spiritual Development

Let’s piggyback off of my previous blog post about getting support with this quote from one of my favorite motivational speakers, Nick Vujicic – a man with no arms, no legs… and it’s no problem.

I follow him on Facebook, and he posted something recently that really resonated with me. Enough so, that I felt like elaborating on it:

“God’s Three Answers to Prayers”

  1. Yes
  2. Not yet.
  3. I have something better in mind.

It really gave me pause – how often do we TRULY believe that God is answering our prayers?

We all love #1 and we can accept #2. But #3?

Nobody likes asking and not receiving. Of course if we KNEW something better was coming, we would be able to more easily accept not getting what we wanted. Especially if we knew what that something better actually was. ๐Ÿ™‚

Life doesn’t always work that way, though. And no matter how much we study manifesting and the Law of Attraction, there remains some immutable truths: We don’t always get what we want.

Is it because we’re bad at manifesting? Is it because the Law of Attraction isn’t a law… and doesn’t work 100% of the time?

Those questions might run through your mind. That’s normal. It’s also taking us away from the real opportunity here:

To experience Divine support.

To know that we ARE taken care of one way or another. It may not be how we want to be taken care of, yet we are still taken care of.

My belief…

(and by all means, don’t blindly adopt this idea without testing it & trying it out in your life)

Is that the real question of OUTER support depends on our INNER support. When we’re solid within ourselves and we seek to perceive our inner & outer worlds accurately, we empower the world around us to support us more effectively.

For example: If we can’t ask for what we want, it’s nearly impossible for it to be provided to us.

Or if our perception is so blocked that we can’t accept the *possiblity* that an unanswered prayer means something better is coming, then we can’t RECEIVE that possibility. The answer to our prayers might come, but our minds would be closed off to it and miss the opportunity.

Just like this parable about a drowning man…

While out to sea, a large boat became shipwrecked and there was only a single survivor. This man prayed and asked God to save his life. Soon thereafter, another boat came by and offered the man some help.

“No thanks,” he said. “I’m waiting for God to save me.”

The men on the boat shrugged their shoulders and continued. As the man became more deeply concerned, another boat came by. Again, the people aboard offered this man some help, and again he politely decline. “I’m waiting for God to save me,” he said again.

After some time, the man began to lose his faith, and soon after that he died. Upon reaching Heaven, he had a chance to speak with God briefly.

“Why did you let me die? Why didn’t you answer my prayers?”

“Actually, I sent you two boats.”

The man prayed for GOD, and what he received was two of God’s messengers.

My reflection questions for you:

  1. Are there any messengers you might have missed because they didn’t look the way you expected?

  2. If you truly believed that unanswered prayers would lead to something better, how might you live your life differently?
  3. What is one small action you can take today to show God that you completely trust… “this or something better”?
Getting Support

Getting Support

Written by Chris Cade on . Posted in Spiritual Development

A little over a year ago, I was going through an unexpected heartbreak. I had spent some time with an amazing woman, and I opened my heart up to dating her.

Unfortunately, she wasn’t in the same place.

And though we’re still wonderful friends and I value her Presence in my life greatly, at the time I took it really hard. In that pain, I realized a very simple truth:

Few of us actually ask for what we need in our lives.

I needed support. I needed to be seen, heard, and supported. This was difficult though because I live in a less-populated area with no close friends nearby.

I felt alone.

In the past when I felt alone, I’d withdraw even further. I’d hide and keep my feelings to myself. Part of me didn’t feel worthy to ask for support. Part of me was scared I wouldn’t receive it.

But I wasn’t that person anymore, and so I chose a different route.

I posted the following message to my small group of personal friends on Facebook:

“Going through a transformational time, and I’d like your support…

For many reasons, too often people are afraid to ask for what they want and need. That’s just plain silly though, since there’s a neverending well of support available to us for the asking.

So I’m asking!

“Please write a comment (or PM or text me) about something you like / love / appreciate about me.”

It’s important to notice I didn’t ask for help or well-wishes. That wasn’t the support I personally needed in that moment.

My heart was broken and I needed to feel loved. I needed to feel the fullness of my heart so that I could love myself back together again.

The comments people wrote were really touching and a powerful reminder of who I am, how I impact people, and the way I show up in the world.

And the reason I’m sharing this with you is because there are a LOT of ways that we often don’t ask for the support we want and need. Yet there’s so much available to us when we reach out and actually let people into our world… into our hearts.

So next time you find yourself feeling unsupported, look around and be curious what support might actually be available to you…

If you were to only ask.

Would You Choose Love Or Fear?

Will You Choose Love Or Fear?

Written by Chris Cade on . Posted in Spiritual Development

Here's a hypothetical situation that I hope nobody ever has to experience…

Suppose a terrorist has taken you and your family hostage, and this terrorist says:

"You have two choices. Choice #1: Walk away from your family and I'll spare all your lives. The only catch is, you can never talk to them again.

"Or you can take Choice #2: Go through a series of extensive challenges and tests. They're some of the hardest in the world. The tests change as you take them. And they could take you months or even years to complete.

"During your testing period, you won't see your family at all. If you pass all of the tests, I will set you and your family free. If you don't pass, I will kill you and torture your family for several years."

Sure it's a very extreme example. But it serves to answer one simple question: When faced with extreme adversity, will you choose love or fear?

It's easy to choose love when life is good. And even during times of normal adversity, choosing love doesn't have to be difficult. However, it's when life gets the most difficult that we have to decide if we'll continue on the path of love or if we will identify with fear. That's not an easy decision to make. It seems like it should be.

Choose love, right? Always choose love?

Except for two things. First, we have a lot of historical programming that directs our attention towards fear. Secondly, the example above challenges the notion that we always know the best way to express love.

One of those choices guarantees that everybody lives… but doesn't guarantee they live happily. Maybe they do after healing from the trauma and separation. Maybe the trauma and separation destroy their lives. You can't be certain. That choice expresses love through a guarantee of protection. The outcome is certain. Unfortunately, the rewards are limited.

The other choice expresses love through courage. The path is uncertain. The outcome is uncertain. And the rewards are limitless. Another way of asking the "love or fear" question is this: Is the greatest risk worth the greatest reward?

Like I said, it's an extreme example. The thing is though, it's not so far off from reality. We are making these kinds of smaller decisions every single day.

Will you be totally authentic with your partner?
– Risk: Rejection, conflict, and pain, destruction of family.
– Reward: Profound intimacy and unbridled happiness.

Will you give your employer (or business) 100%?
– Risk: Going unnoticed, failure, being overworked, bankruptcy, and more.
– Reward: Increased pay, promotions, flourishing business, global change.

Will you dedicate your life to personal transformation?
– Risk: Wasted time, ineffective results, wasted money, disillusionment.
– Reward: A life of peace, joy, happiness, and love.

In each example, the choice is between love and fear.

Most people give "just enough" to their relationships, their work, and their personal transformation efforts. It's almost like the example above: They are identifying with just enough fear so that they protect themselves with limited rewards. They aren't choosing to giving themselves fully to the world and thereby reaping the greatest rewards possible.

We can't always know the risks and rewards in advance. Life is too uncertain, too fluid, to mysterious for that. What we can know are our values. We can practice risk versus reward and love versus fear in smaller safe situations. Then we can work up to bigger situations.

Practice being authentic with a llfe coach or best friend. Practice giving 100% to a new business adventure in your spare time. Practice devoting 6 months to a single personal transformation program without distraction. For just a brief period in your life, in a safe context, simply choose unconditional unrestrained love.

See if the risks are worth the rewards. See if love conquers fear. Find out what's true for you.

New Year's Blessing

A New Year’s Blessing For You

Written by Chris Cade on . Posted in Spiritual Development

As we come upon the new year, it’s a time when most of us make resolutions…

Whether it’s to change some of our lifestyle habits that no longer serve us…

Negative thinking that gets in the way of achieving our dreams…

Or to let go of something in the past and make room for new joys and gifts.

No matter what you may be resolving, and even if you’re not making any, I have a short yet powerful blessing to support you in this new year.

Welcome to 2016!Together, we can make this a reality… let's share this blessing and watch it multiply <3 <3 <3

Posted by Positive Affirmations For A Better Life on Friday, January 1, 2016

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